Asshole Meets Psycho

There was this asshole, which is me, and I was just finishing filling up my tank when this teenaged boy drives up to the next pump with his mobile phone glued to one ear or the other as he maneuvered into place. For some reason I took an instant dislike to the guy. As I'm screwing the gas cap back on, he comes up and politely asks if I can help him with something, I didn't quite catch what. But being in touch with my inner asshole as I am, and really not wanting to have anything to do with this guy, I politely told him I couldn't, as I was in a hurry.

At this his face changed from polite smile to crestfallen disbelief, to anger in the space of a second. "You mean you don't even have time to [transmission garbled]?" I never COULD figure out what he wanted me to do. Anyway, I said "Sorry" and got in my car. As I was preparing to drive away, he said "Thanks for nothing! Have a nice day dickhead!" and patted my car rather aggressively.

At that point, I thought briefly about making a big deal out of it, but I really did have better things to do, besides which I have unpaid traffic tickets for which I could get thrown in jail if I have any impromptu meetings with the police. As I drove away, he made following motions, as if to show he was ready to pounce on my car at any time.

So then I'm thinking "Shit, this is going to be like that movie 'Fear' where Mark Walhberg plays Reese Witherspoon's psycho boy friend and beats the crap out of her father's vintage Mustang with a baseball bat when he doesn't get his way." But unlike Wahlberg, this guy was just a scrawny kid, and I made the whole thing as impersonal and emotionless as I possibly could, something I learned the hard way in New York City back in the '80s when just looking at someone on the subway could get you mugged.

Anyway, if the guy had just continued to be polite and explained to me what he wanted, I probably would have helped him, despite my first impressions, which were wholly confirmed by my second and third impressions. What a spoiled little brat! I've been a beggar before, and I've been accosted by beggars who were well seasoned in their craft. You never throw a hissy fit because someone tells you "no" on your first foray.

So was this kid a psycho, or just a spoiled brat? Or am I a psycho? I like to think of myself as an asshole, but it's possible I'm giving myself credit where none is due.